How To Avoid Hangovers

Throughout my years I’ve learned a few things approaching a magical age I dare not speak of (40)… I’ve learned how to avoid the hangovers. And I’ll teach you all this, in 4 easy steps! A course of a lifetime you’ll never forget!

I’ve been doing research for years! I’ve been practicing my ass off! I’ve been training my whole life for this moment, I swear to you. Culminating just to be this well-versed leader before you…

Not to be done in any particular order… however if you decide to eat later, that could be the best.

• Drink water & hydrate – Make sure to drink lots of water while drinking (you’re not a pussy). In fact, my rule is for every one beer, drink a half of that of water. Moreso if you continue to drink throughout the night. It’s all about hydration, baby… and soda doesn’t count!
• Take a full leak – When you feel the need to go, just go. Go before you start drinking. They do say if you “break the seal” you’ll have to go more so be cognizant of that. But if you do decide to go (and you should “go”) make sure to push and empty it all out. I mean strain yourself… Pretend you have three bladders and you need to empty them all. Get it all out! You won’t have to go to the bathroom so many times later.
• Eat a meal – Food is very important to soak up the alcohol. You need food either before, during, or after you drink. Do not drink on an empty stomach or you must be very mindful about the previous tips!
• Drink a lot before you sleep – Before you lay your head down in that final resting place for the night (hopefully it’s not a gutter or a toilet) drink lots of water or juice. Drink like it’s going to be your last time ever to drink in your life. Your body needs hydration. No soda!

The next day… Assuming you’ve followed the above advice. (Even if you haven’t, do this anyway.)

• Sleep as long as you can – Getting a good sleep is one of the keys. It should be easy to fall asleep.
• Hydrate when you wake up – Several times during the night you may need to wake up and go to the bathroom. Drink water or preferably juice (a few gulps of it) during these periods than take a leak. Hopefully you’ll be able to fall asleep after this. Soda doesn’t count!
• Get breakfast – Something to hydrate you and give you energy.
• Drink juice – Juice is the best. Or Gatorade. Always have some. Juice (natural 100%) works the best though. None of that US 10% juice shit. The real stuff. No soda.
• Have a good lunch – If you only eat twice a day (breakfast/brunch and dinner) do three meals this day. Eat a good lunch. I’m usually done any remanence of a hangover by my second meal.

Also try to avoid “hangxiety.” I get it all the time and it sucks but just try to think you’re living your best life. Drunk you has nothing to do with you. The minor mistakes you made while drinking, try not to think about them. It’s difficult (I know) but best to forget them. I’m sure everyone else has.

Best of luck in your next drinking night and SAÚDE!